Monday, June 6, 2011

Weiner Comes Clean

In recent news, Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-NY, pronounced WEE-ner) has admitted to wrong-doing.  In the name of  journalistic integrity on this blog, I researched by googling "exposed weiner"  (I don't recommend that you do the same).

During this probe, Weiner's cocky attitude has not won him public favor.  As Weiner continued to be grilled,  he was reluctant to rise to the level of integrity demanded by his constituents. His lies thus far could be indicative that criminal complaints will follow, leaving the distinct possibility that Weiner will face the U.S. penile system.

Rep. Dick Johnson (R- CA) commented, "Let's be honest- he's been caught. Weiner will have a hard time getting off."  Others disagree, admiring Weiner's forthcoming honesty.  "I don't know why everyone is so hung up on this.  He shouldn't be condemned. In fact, Weiner should have a statue erected in his honor," stated Jimmy Wood, president of the National Foundation for Ethical Behavior.

Although Representative Weiner may or may not be up for re-erectionelection, preliminary talks have begun for him to become the new face of the Oscar Meyer corporation, which would carry a hefty paycheck.

Penis.